I’m proud of…um….I’m proud that I’m able to have as many friends that I have. Even my tumblr friends. <3
Day 18 - A problem that you had
There’s always a problem going on in my life. So to talk about a certain one would be hard. But I usually rant about big problems in my life so if you really want to know give my blog a good looking over :)
I am back home now and by home i mean with my mom. It was a hard decision but I decided to come home to take care of her because she is not able to leave on her own. I just forgot how clustered my room was after the whole ordeal. I mean this shit is cramped like a mother fucker. I’m so spending tomorrow cleaning the shit out of this room. AND FINDING MY FUCKING CABLE BOX! SHE LOST IT! :( anyway, Night tumblr sweeties for now. Muah ;)
I feel really bad all of a sudden… Maybe i should start with the origin of this feelings. A couple of nights ago, i was talking with my fag hag Liz when she brought up this guy I used to like. She was mad at me because I stopped talking to him randomly. Little did she know I stopped talking to because, well not because of the rejection but because of the awkward that happened afterwards. Ok ok that made no sense, i need to go farther back, like a couple of weeks. Me, Liz, Him and liz’s crush boy whatever was on like a double date kinda ish ( at least it was to me ) Anway! We were sitting in the park and he was standing infront of me asking me questions and telling me how he wanted me to see his homeland ( cute shit right?) Out of no where I just blurted out ” I like you but I know you’re straight and this could never work out so lets stop fooling ourselves” he went quiet for a while. Then he said ” You thought i was gay? Me? You didn’t see me not being gay? Cause i’m not” I was already wanting to burst in tears but i didnt I just looked at him and said ” no i did know, i didnt want to accept it so i didnt but now i see no point of putting myself through this again so im just telling you so we can move on with our lives” it got awkward and quiet then i walked over to liz to let her know i was going home. Now from that day on we havent talked. Not a word! until liz brought him back up. I thought about that day and got really sad because he would make me smile no matter what i did wrong and he would always make me feel better but he was straight and the love would never be returned properly. But i decided that even though we cant be more than friends, i still want him as a friend so im going to get his number, call him up, and ask if he wants to go to the fair with me for old shits and gigs. If he says no then fuck him :) cause i still have the picture of the one night i was truly happy. I might up load it one day.
Day 15: Your zodiac/horoscope and if you think it fits your personality
I’m a libra and at times it fits me perfectly but at others I feel as though im like a leo or something all courages and junk. Maybe i just need a leo in my life :)
Day 16: Something you always think “what if” about
I think what if about everything! like any given situation i always think ” well if this happens” or whatever, im constantly doubting something I do but i always do it anyway because i like to prove myself wrong.